Urban Thought Collective

Urban Thought Collective presents a special holiday series featuring our favorite chefs from The Food Network.

The couple is sharing stories about their passion for food, their faith, and the power of black love with UTC.

ON WORKING WITH YOUR SPOUSE
Gina: Being a married couple that works together has been a wonderful experience for us. We’ve been working together long before the television series began, so it is just feels right for us. We are as authentic as it comes. We create boundaries. There is a deep respect and compassion that we have for one another that goes beyond being on TV. There is no “I” in team! We are considerate and we know each other so well that one of us can recognize when the other is not feeling great or just not at the very top of their game.

Pat: This is very true. When Gina and I were first married, she worked as a bank executive and I had just opened up my first restaurant. It just works because we are able to be together and stay in tune to each other’s moods, needs and personality. If I’m having a bad day, Gina steps up and vice versa.

Gina: We know each other’s strengths and weaknesses and it’s a beautiful balance. We were high school sweethearts. Even our parents knew each other, so we have just been around each other all of our lives. We have so much in common. I think it’s hard for couples to know when to step back and give each other the space they need. But we have developed a style and a language all our own.

ON BLACK LOVE
Pat: Being one of a handful of African Americans on the network, we have never felt any particular pressure to be anything other than ourselves. We cook dishes that are familiar to us, that we grew up with. That’s not black or white or anything, that’s just good, down home food. We all love to eat no matter what color we are! The network has never tried to direct us towards anything other than authenticity.

Gina: We do feel a certain responsibility to conduct ourselves in a respectful way towards one another as African Americans. We just wanted to be real and think out of the box. We have meals that we grew up eating that we put a fresh, younger spin on. We call it the “recipe remix!”

Gina: Barack and Michelle Obama prove that black love is beautiful and alive.

Pat: Black love has always been there. I get tired of the same old characterizations of black relationships. It’s always the single mom raising her kids alone, baby daddy nowhere to be found. Of course that exists, but that’s not everyone’s experience. I just want these young men to know, you can meet a woman, give her the ultimate respect. You can stay with your spouse, raise kids, love each other…

Gina: Yes, unfortunately, too often the negative speaks the loudest. Although we know black love exists, The Obamas have put it in the mainstream. What comes across with them is that they are just real. It is clear that you can’t shake them! I sit in the beauty shop sometimes and you hear folks talking about Keisha Cole (television show) or something and how that’s a real black family. But, it doesn’t all have to be dysfunction. It’s almost like if its not messed up, they don’t consider it to be real. I’m glad Pat and I are able to deliver the opposite message. Our show is also a marriage ministry for us. We realize this is bigger than us.

ON WHAT COOKING MEANS TO THEM
Pat: Growing up there wasn’t a whole lot of money. You know, our entertainment was cooking and sharing meals with the family. Every Sunday it was the big dinner after church where we get together, talk and laugh. It wasn’t like we could all go to the theater or the movies or out to eat. So, we made home the place where we entertained ourselves.

Gina: It’s definitely the way we were raised. It was about being together. When you cook something you can taste the love in it. It’s a way of expressing love for your family and it creates lasting memories.

Pat: I have been cooking since I was 15, had my own restaurant when I was 23. I have a very humble background. Cooking was an event. So today, with my kids, it’s always “Momma and Daddy, what’s for dinner?!” And you know, with us always having them help us cook, it’s also a time where my daughter may open up to my wife more. She may hear about her day and her crushes, anything comes through when you are together in the kitchen. They can get off that phone and texting and get off the computer and communicate. It definitely fosters conversation.

TRY THEIR RECIPE FOR MACARONI AND CHEESE AND TELL US WHAT YOU THINK!
Macaroni and Cheese
Recipe courtesy The Neelys

6 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
4 cups milk, warm
1 teaspoon dry mustard
1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
Dash salt and freshly ground black pepper
Dash hot sauce
Dash Worcestershire sauce
3 cups shredded Cheddar
1 pound cavatappi pasta, cooked al dente
1 cup crushed potato chips
5 slices cooked bacon, crumbled
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan, for topping

Heat oven to 350 degrees F.

Melt 6 tablespoons butter in a large saucepot over medium heat. Add flour and cook, stirring, for 1 minute. Whisk in the warmed milk and bring to a boil, continue to whisk constantly. The mixture will thicken as the heat increases. Continue to stir while adding the dry mustard, nutmeg, cayenne, salt, pepper, hot sauce and Worcestershire. Stir in the 3 cups of Cheddar until it melts.

Pour the cheese sauce over the noodles and add to a 3 quart casserole dish.

Sprinkle the chips, bacon and Parmesan on top and bake for 35 minutes.

Yield: 6 servings
Prep Time: 15 minutes
Cook Time: 50 minutes
Ease of preparation: easy

As co-owners of Neely’s Bar-B-Que, Pat and Gina Neely have one of the most successful barbecue restaurant chains in the south. They share the secrets behind their favorite dishes on their series “Down Home with the Neelys.” Tune in Saturdays at 11am/10c, Sundays at 1pm/12c and Mondays at 1:30pm/12:30c. Their thoughts are shared exclusively with Urban Thought Collective, courtesy of The Food Network.