Urban Thought Collective

Since the Tamara Gregorys of the world have made it quite clear that it would be nice to see us in something other than some shell-toes and a Fat Albert t-shirt, let me put you up on game, fellas.

Why? Because I don’t want you to get tripped up by the pet peeves and so Tamara will invite you back for date #2, Uncle D.

Rule number one is don’t go near the mall and especially not to a Hugo Boss store near you, unless your name is Kobe and you’ve just got a grown man’s checking account like that. You’ve got to find what works for you. Go into Hugo Boss or Canali to find a style you like, and then find it somewhere else. I’m unfortunately, in the unique position of not being able to stroll into any store to get anything. Most of the time, due to my height, I end up doing some interesting things like getting suits at a spot called Eccetera in Montreal and working business trips or jazz festivals in as my “official” excuse for going there. Eccetera works for me because the manager is my size and makes it a point to carry large sizes, dispensing with the hassle of having to order or significantly tailor. A few years ago, when the U.S. dollar was strong, this was a great deal and I came home with Canali this and Hugo that.

Last year, not so much. Not to worry though because there’s a thing called the Magic Show. Held in Las Vegas twice a year (just last week actually), the Magic Show is the preeminent trade event in the international fashion industry, hosting global buyers and sellers of men’s, women’s and children’s apparel, footwear, accessories and sourcing resources. If you can make it to the next one in February, you just might be able to find a deal or two. There’s a cat at my church that swears by this show and looks like a GQ model every Sunday as a result, without spending all of his cheese in the process.

Speaking of cheese, here’s another way to impress after you’ve actually gone through and successfully delivered your line (be it “Hi My Name is..,” or something infinitely more creative), got the number and secured a date. This one is nice because you can take your show on the road if necessary (i.e. she ain’t diggin’ you enough yet to actually agree to come to your spot).

On a recent night of entertaining at the Penthouse, I brought the fancy restaurant/wine cellar experience alive in my own kitchen with a couple of nice bottles of wine (one red, one white) and an assortment of cheeses to accompany. I know what you’re thinking Nicq, but au contrer mon frer. You CAN afford this. Here’s how I do it.

When I’m out and about at these nice restaurants, I always cruise the wine list for things that look interesting even if slightly out of my price range (this latest accountant is not as taken by my charm and good looks as the last one) and make mental notes so that when I’m back home and strollin’ through Whole Foods, I might find these same selections but for a fraction of the cost. Before you start in about how you don’t get to go to all the restaurants like I do, here’s my backup plan. I also subscribe to an email letter put out by Canal’s Bottle Shop just off Route 70 in South Jersey. For you Philly folks, this is just a short trip out to Cherry Hill. I get email from these guys at least twice a week with new selections that they have on sale and they even deliver. Their prices are more reasonable than the restaurants, but since I’m never really home reliably enough to have stuff delivered, I usually just use this email for the information.

Armed with this info, I go to my favorite wine store and make the purchase. We don’t have the time to go into what’s what, so I’ll give you my selections from that night. I served the Altos Las Hormigas Malbec (2007, Mendoza, Argentina) that I had just had at dinner in Chile a few weeks back with some havarti, gouda, and gorgonzola cheeses that I dressed up with some red and green grapes on a plate. This wine was at Whole Foods for about $11 and I’ve seen it on Canal’s website for $9, compared to the $40+ that I usually see it at the restaurants. After dinner, I poured a bottle of Undurraga Late Harvest Reserva (2005, Maipo Region, Chile) that I picked up at the duty free on my way home last time. I literally Google’d “what cheese goes with what wine” to find out that I should pick up some brie, fontina, and stilton to go with this. This was a very fruity dessert wine, so the sweetness of the lemon stilton cheese went nicely. Again, these are things that look impressive, but you can do them with a little planning and it won’t break you.

My bad, Culturepop. I know I shouldn’t be giving away the secrets for free. But if we get the each one, teach one thing going, everybody wins. (Kamalp is dying to take the torch from you.) I’m sure the ladies will agree.

Destah Owens is a single father of two from Northern California and proud UCLA Bruin who travels the world for his job as a computer engineer. His blog, “Soufflés in Saigon,” is exclusive to Urban Thought Collective.