ENTERTAINMENT/OPINION/TELEVISION

Whoopi & Sherri, Please Stop

Just stop using the “N” word in public. Stop advocating the word’s use in private. What will it take? Who must weigh in on this subject to end this debate? When will our community unite in the understanding that self denigration isn’t self love? How can we convince Brothers and Sisters “reclaiming” the word is at best a fantasy and at worst revisionist history?

The View” became “the hot topic” last week when a discussion of the “N” word caused co-host Elizabeth Hasselbeck to cry. The media promoted the story as a “catfight” and mischaracterized Whoopi as “attacking” Elizabeth. That’s no surprise. That’s what the media does to get ratings and sell magazines.

I see the real issue being that two of the most prominent women of color on television publicly advocated the use of a racial slur. It breaks my heart.

I must confess my bias. I love Whoopi Goldberg. She is wildly talented, bright, provocative, and insightful and even as an Academy Award winner, I think her career is horribly underappreciated. Not by me. Her voice and presence on “The View” has really lifted the show. Her opinion carries weight. That’s why I’m going to try and convince Whoopi, Sherri and anyone who will listen, to JUST STOP!

I’m not the first person, or the most influential, to call for an end to using the word. So let me get in line. Let me pick just a few people whose life and work for civil rights, justice and humanity did not or has not included publicly advocating the use of the “N” word. Dr. Martin Luther King , Medger Evers, Malcolm X, A Phillip Randolph, Adam Clayton Powell, Thurgood Marshall, Shirley Chisholm , Gandhi, Dorothy Height, Dr. Cornell West, Desmond Tutu , Maya Angelou, Sidney Poitier and Nelson Mandela . That’s just the tip of the iceberg. Who else do we need to hear from?

I believe in the freedom of speech. I believe in the right to privacy. I will defend everyone’s freedom to do and say whatever they feel in private. But the days of using the word “amongst ourselves” are gone. We are promoting the proliferation of the word around the globe! Our music, our films and some of our best and brightest will publicly campaign to call their friends and themselves a racial slur. It’s the greatest Jedi mind trick ever pulled!

Furthermore, why only that word? Why not “reclaim” all hateful speech? There are lots of words we use in private that we would never campaign to use publicly. What’s the difference?

I know the good old argument. We take the word they used against us, to hate us, and use it as a term of endearment. We “reclaimed” it. I understand it. I know the feeling is real. I’ve done it. But here is the hard, cold fact. In order to “reclaim” the word, by definition, we have to take “it”, and its power, away from somebody. That is NEVER going to happen. We will never stop racist individuals from using that word to mean everything it was intended to mean. The day a White racist walks up to a Black person, calls him or her the “N” word and gets a hug and a smile because they feel “endearment”…isn’t coming.

I am even more baffled by why anyone wants to rewrite history. Let history mark the evil of racists. Let the lynch mobs bare the stain of their hate. I don’t want it sanitized or watered down. Do you see Jewish people “reclaiming” the swastika as a symbol of “endearment?”

Here is another hard, cold fact. Nine times out of ten when WE use the word it’s pejorative or simply a description. “Man N’s were acting a fool”, “N’s were all over Vegas at All Star Weekend” and the ever popular, “N please.” Where’s the love in that?

We don’t even reserve the word for us. I see Brothers daily, using the word towards ANYBODY! White, Asian, Indian… it doesn’t matter. Then there’s the reality that White people are using it with each other, Asian people are using it with each other. Anywhere you go there’s a car blasting music with someone singing the word, who’s not Black. For Black people who don’t use the word and haven’t relinquished their right to be offended by the word, confronting someone outside of our community who feels entitled to use the word is not uncommon. It’s what separates Black Americans from all other people of color around the world. We’re the only ones, in the history of man, who fight for the right to denigrate ourselves.

We all know what would happen if a White CEO, politician or anyone of power and influence used the word publicly. The outrage would put an end to their career. The decision would come from the Black community and be supported by the majority of the White community. Dr. King wrote about his disappointment in the lack of support from Whites moderates. Today, if only on this issue, we have the support of Christians, Jews and moderate Whites that Dr. King yearned for. Yet, our “house divided” can’t take advantage. Imagine how different the world would be if ANYONE who used the word faced the same consequences.

On a personal note, I get annoyed just having this debate. Not on substance, but on practicality. By advocating against the word, I usually have to say the word just to demonstrate that I’m not “afraid” of the word. However, I hate saying “the N word.” It seems juvenile but it is what it is.

This year we may elect the first Black president. The same year that candidate gave a brilliant speech on race. On the first day Barack Obama is in the Oval Office, do you want Nelson Mandela to walk in and say “what’s up my N?”

There’s a brilliant poem by Julian Curry (not the English actor) on Def Poetry Jam. If you haven’t seen it, check it out!

Whoopi, Sherri, Brothers, Sisters, everyone, please, Just Stop.

Darryl Bell is an actor and Chicago native, best known for his roles in classic TV series “A Different World” and Spike Lee’s “School Daze.” His unique television commentary is exclusive to Urban Thought Collective.


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Comments

July 23rd, 2008 at 10:01 pm Tawnie says:

#1

July 23rd, 2008 at 10:01 pm SweetSis says:

ONE!

July 23rd, 2008 at 10:12 pm Tawnie says:

I’d never seen that Def Jam. Thanks. Very tight!

July 23rd, 2008 at 10:21 pm Red Razor says:

So over the Nword thing. I agree w/u and hope ppl can change their POV about it and move on. But thats a looong looong shot.

July 23rd, 2008 at 11:14 pm JaimeSez says:

Point taken. I’m with banishing the word alltogether. Can’t people see how useless it is? Glad you spoke on it Darryl.

July 23rd, 2008 at 11:33 pm SweetSis says:

I can’t even deal with the view - too annoying.

July 24th, 2008 at 2:18 am FutureFilmMaker says:

I LOVE THAT POEM!!!!! One of my friends performed it in high school and it was so suiting because we went to a historically black hs and so many of my peers used the excuse that the n word was okay because we changed the meaning. I just think it is all about transparency. We took a glass house and did a little renovation but at the foundation it is still a glass house where you can see all the damage that the n word has done to our people. I honestly don’t think that it will change because people are so stuck in their ways but hopefully it does as more become educated on the history behind it.

July 24th, 2008 at 2:24 am Binta Rohan says:

Excellent excellent points Darryl Bell.

July 24th, 2008 at 2:44 am Bernadette Jasmin says:

I agree with your sentiments. Whoopi Golberg is a wonderful and bright entertainer, but she does not represent the feelings of all African Americans. She is free to express her opinions on these issues, but not all would agree with her conclusions on this.

I have made it a point to never use that word or to allow it to be used by my family. In order to gain respect one has to respect oneself and I too do not advocate to use of the “N” word.

July 24th, 2008 at 7:11 am lolalove says:

“We’re the only ones, in the history of man, who fight for the right to denigrate ourselves.” -THAT JUST GAVE ME CHILLS… WOW. WHEN YOU THINK OF IT THAT WAY IT GOES BEYOND BEING FOOLISH AND CARELESS USING THE WORD - ITS SELF LOATHING

July 24th, 2008 at 7:47 am CeaseNYC says:

Sherri Shephrad shouldn’t be on TV - she’s unwatchable. Whoopi, Im disappointed in. She’s usually a ridah.

July 24th, 2008 at 7:56 am Najee Ali says:

On my way out of town but i had to check in & co-sign with Bro D.Bell 100%
I was done with Whoopi when she and her boyfriend Ted Danson peformed in Black face at an event and got booed off the stage.

July 24th, 2008 at 9:07 am hisherness says:

i wonder, if someone pulled a Clockwork Orange sort of thing with such brilliant performances, whether that Nas child would take off the shirt i saw in a recent gallery.

the root of this is a lack of self-respect and confidence. this word is an excuse in many ways. what i hear when i hear people call themselves nigger, call they’re friends niggers, is essentially this:

i’m less. i’m not equal. i’m not worth as much as others. i’m where i ought to be. i have what i ought to have and i’m not worth more. and since this way is Right, i needn’t try, i needn’t strive, i needn’t make efforts. because i am, after all, just a nigger. and that’s OK.

the grand reclamation of the word nigger did no more than append “and that’s OK.”

July 24th, 2008 at 9:36 am Jessica Hubbard says:

It is a struggle to keep this word out of my mouth. And I love my people and myself so I’m always confused as to why its is just a part of my lingo. Years and years of music, conversations, offhanded mentions of it - it just seeps in. But I make a pledge to erase myself of this! Its sick the way we use it - there is no excuse like you said Darryl!

July 24th, 2008 at 9:46 am Allison says:

I saw this episode and felt that Whoopi was explaining the use of the word not necessarily advocating it. If she was I missed that. I totally agree with you that we just need to stop using the word. With all the words in the dictionary and even those that aren’t I think we can come up with something better. Let’s move on.

July 24th, 2008 at 10:40 am Kettle Blk says:

Damn - yes yes yes

July 24th, 2008 at 11:43 am thelma says:

@Allison I agree– we need to get right with ourselves. Its embarrasing when we say -’you can’t say it, but we can.’ when you think about it it just doesn’t make sense

July 24th, 2008 at 12:14 pm culturepop says:

I loved your perpective on this. Its some tough love that has to start within and then to our families and the community at large. Like Najee said, we gotta ban it within our own inner circle and just kill it. its a crying shame. my daddy went thru hell so i wouldn’t have to be treated or called a nigger OR a nigga. but we do it to ourselves. like my man tupac said “use your brain. its not them that’s knocking us off, its US that’s knocking us off.”

July 24th, 2008 at 12:56 pm chica22 says:

I see both sides of teh argument because I’ve been on both. Now I’m in a place where I don’t say it but I don’t begrudge some of Whoopi’s arguments. Now Sherri just comes off dumb in everything she says so I wanted her to shhushh. But Whoopi had some valid points in that they articulate the true believe of many people. Because they don’t align with mine, I won’t call them ignorant or wrong, just that I don’t agree.

July 24th, 2008 at 2:01 pm heatmizer says:

That View episode was really me seeing Whoopi explode! To me I laugh at how whites see the word as so hateful as they knwo the context that their forefathers used it in. The fact that we use it is wrong but at least Whoopi gave some kind of explaination (wrong or not) for why there are deep issues that white folks don’t seem to want to acknowldge. If it was all about a word we’d be in better shape than this. So much hate, so little time

July 24th, 2008 at 4:39 pm Philip Giddings says:

Nuff’ said! We gotta be the generation that gets this nasty thing off our backs

July 24th, 2008 at 10:05 pm nomoredrama says:

i have to be honest… I don’t think this will EVER die. THis is because this new generation doesn’t even know where it came from and they don’t even have the sense to be ashamed of it. Imagine 30 years down the line, history may think that WE came up with it for ourselves… Anyone agree??

July 25th, 2008 at 5:43 am Big Ced says:

What’s up, Mr. Bell! I agree with you and have said years ago that I would stop using the word and of course, got caught in the going back to using the word again. On my site, in many articles, I have chastised people for using the term in front of other races and felt comfortable saying so. I also agree with you when Hip Hop artists use it in the most popular songs as other races have the license to repeat the lyrics or hookw these rappers use. I cringed when Jay-Z titled his song and his hook, ‘Jigga My Nigga’ and i couldn’t get mad at white people for repeating the hook when they heard the song. Of course it has to start with us and hopefully it can get through to the rappers, comedians and Jesse Jackson….

July 25th, 2008 at 8:43 am Zaria Garrison says:

I totally disagree with you Darryl. The N word, or any word for that matter should be no more powerful than the person who is using it.

We have given this word too much power and we need to stop. Once we stop giving it so much power, it won’t have it anymore.

On the TV show Girlfriends, they often referred to each other as b*tch, heffa, or other derogatory terms in an endearing manner or sometimes an insulting manner.

It wasn’t the word that defined it, it was the context. Used in proper context that word can not and does not have any power.

But when used in a hateful manner it becomes a monster and grows daily. Not just because it was used, but because we have to have debate after debate over this word.

The most famous word in the English language. The only word to ever have people daily advocating that no one can use it.

Lastly, the sheer thought of putting the N word in the closet, and only using it privately is ridiculous. It’s the same word. That’s like saying “I cuss, but not in front of my momma.”

Let’s stop looking at the word, and look at the context in which is was used. If it’s a hateful context, let’s stop it. If it’s an endearing context or a descriptive context, why do we even care?

July 25th, 2008 at 11:32 am buttabrown says:

wow that poem just about brought me to tears… oh my people can’t we raise up from this???

July 25th, 2008 at 5:37 pm Darryl M. Bell says:

Thanks to everyone for your comments!

Sister BB, I can’t tell you how many e-mails I’ve received from folks who cried when they saw it. I wish he hadn’t left the stage so quickly, so he could have soaked up the standing ovation and felt power of those he moved so deeply.

Sister Zaria, “totally disagree”? That is saying something. I will be true to my word, and try to convince you.

“We” haven’t given the word any power. Words have meaning and power. Words have inspired men and women to change the course of human history. It’s why writers, write. The greater your vocabulary, the greater your ability to express your thoughts and ideas.

Because I acknowledge what the word means, makes me neither differential nor impotent. In the fight for righteousness, justice and truth, I simply have the ability to recognize and label hate and evil. The idea that we need to add new meanings or allow for context, sounds like we need to allow people to take off their sheets and hats, extinguish their burning cross, put on a suit and tie, smile at us and say, “no, you can’t work here.”

You’re right about “Girlfriends”. They did frequently call each other derogatory names. That was the only reason I didn’t watch the show regularly. Adding more ways to verbally condescend, bludgeon and cut each other is like drowning me in the ocean instead of the bath tub.

In the end, a lively debate on a substantive issue, is always good. However, we need to have some basic understanding of garden variety truths. Public and private speech exists. Common courtesy in a civilized society isn’t a platitude. Most of us would argue that the public discourse has become so toxic, due to the erosion of simple manors, home training and pride. What are the standards by which we all should live? Why does it seem like too many of us look the other way while the bar sinks and are too afraid to fight to raise the bar to new heights?

Most of us have heard it before, the greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was convincing the world he didn’t exist…I’m not tricked.

Finally, I could quantify it, but trust me, I’m right, the most famous word in the English language is….LOVE!

July 29th, 2008 at 7:49 am Brown Sugar says:

Darryl, you have just said it all in one word the word “LOVE”. If we gave it as much power as the “N” word it would be amazing as to where it would take us on a much higher level as people.
Peace & Blessings always keeping it real.

August 5th, 2008 at 4:37 pm Keith Josef at The Root says:

Daryl. Daryl. Daryl.

Thanks for spreading this message. I’m with you 1000 percent!

We MUST get rid of this damaging [and I mean spiritually and emotionally damaging] word.

August 29th, 2008 at 5:05 am Saideh Browne says:

I jus saw my son’s aol buddy list and one of the headings was “my niggaz”

And please believe we don’t speak like that in our home!

What can be done now. Rap, I believe, really desensitized us (and the world) to the word. I worked in the industry for many years as a publicist and hear is used very loosely by ALL races. I made my exodus in 2003 but the damage has already been done.

Much to my disdain.

Saideh Browne
Platinum Speakers Bureau
NYC, NY

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