i just KNEW this was tamara gregory’s column. heeeeeeelarious style.

utc must have one heckuva recruiter over there. these 2 sisters are some of the BEST writers ive seen out here on the dub.

ps: i’ve been vewwy vewwy bad boy too…what r u gonna do about it? woof! woof!

I enjoyed the article, but I did feel remoreful that the author focused on making the right behavioral adaptations to create the external reality she desires. It just seems that there needs to an equal amount of time for examining why she has been walking around feeling wimpy, sad, and tearful. Those feelings may have a reasonable source or they might just be due to old wounds from previous relationships or childhood that have no bearing ont he current relationship. She just skipped to modifying her behavior to create the most desirable external reality. The problem is, even when we try to put forth one external reaity our interior life still has a way of manifesting anyway, so I don’t know if the behavioral modifications are a good long term solution.

One note to any women who this article resonates with: A lot of men have no tolerance for being exposed to your emotional stuff, but this has mostly to do with not wanting to confront their own emotional stuff. However, many men are a little more in touch with their feelings than you might know. They might be able to tolerate exposure to your interior life. Some might even call that intimacy. If you are really lucky your dude has a few healthy relationships with other women (mother, aunt, sister, friends, therapist?) and so he understands the difference between emotional ups and downs that don’t require him to do anything (except be a little empathetic maybe), and emotions that really require his attention and concern.

Anyway, the article was an interesting read, but more so for the reminder of how we objectify our mates to the point of seeking out more control and power in our relationships. Don’t get me wrong. Ee all need a certain sense of feeling like we can influence our relationships, I just think it can be taken too far. Just because you have power and influence, should you use it? How do you know when you are asking for too much power and control? I would love to hear from said “man tamer” on the conscientious wielding of her powers of control and balancing that with acceptance and allowing.

GREAT BLOG!!!!!!!
LOOKING FORWARD TO MORE!!!!