Urban Thought Collective

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

I’m sitting here in another hotel room, in yet another country flipping through the 7 television channels that my remote control actually tunes to, despite what the “channel” channel says is available. Actually, it’s more of an inn than hotel. And come to think of it, the term “city” isn’t quite accurate either. The Boston Celtics have just destroyed the Los Angeles Lakers and since there’s no ESPN up here I can’t even tune-in to see the post-game press conference. Damn. I was kind of looking forward to hearing Kobe explain this one after his bed-wetting reference following their last collapse. This was a massacre though. Oh well. With work and travel, I managed to watch a total of 48 contiguous minutes of NBA Finals Basketball just once in six games.

At least dinner was good. Actually, dinner was remarkable and the dessert even better. I’m not at all diggin’ the ground floor accommodations, but the couch, hot tub and fireplace are a nice touch. I had better get some rest as 7am EST is going to come awfully quick to my Pacific Standard time body that has been awake since 4:45 AM to make my early flight out of SFO.

Wednesday June 18, 2008

“What IS that?” I thought to myself as the shrill sounds emanating from my cell phone/alarm clock shook me from a deep slumber. The wrong side of the bed is surely where I have awoken on this fine morning. Shaking myself out of a foul mood and saying my morning “thank you for waking me one more time, Lord…,” I dropped to the floor and knocked out 30 push-ups, headed over to open the drapes and let the sunshine in, and was struck by the sheer magnificence of this place. In the darkness of last evening, it appeared as though I was retiring to some sort of cabin bunkhouse but the morning light has made it glaringly apparent that 45.5 degrees N latitude, 78.3 W longitude is most definitely neither inn, nor hotel, but indeed 100% resort. The Couples Resort to be exact. Still not totally coherent since I was unable to immediately fall out last night until the couple that were apparently my upstairs neighbors had finished, well…, “coupling,” I was quickly overcome by the serenity of the picturesque lake just below the deck outside my sliding glass door. The silence of this morning was so loud that I could almost hear it. So entranced was I that I probably would have walked out there in my boxers had it not been a cool and drizzly 10 C (that’s 50 degrees Fahrenheit for us Yankees).

Down the shore a little ways, I could see boats and canoes near a small pier and straight across the water were quaint little cottages set perfectly against a backdrop of Algonquin Park, Ontario, Canada forest. It looked like a postcard…or a Henry Fonda movie, or maybe both.

My co-worker and I rolled in here looking every bit as out of place as a 5’9” middle-aged Italian man from Philadelphia wearing shorts and argyle socks with some loafers and a 6’7” brotha in a baseball hat and Adidas sweat suit from Oakland, California could look amidst the myriad of honeymooners and anniversary celebrants here in the rural, Great White North. I was just waiting for the inter-racial Chuck and Larry reference to be whispered within earshot at any moment. Let it never be said that my business trips don’t put me in some interesting situations.

We’re here to remedy the limited selection of television options by installing our product line’s Video On Demand system offering. Now, anyone that knows me is quite aware that I’ll take the city life over the sticks any day (I’d be the brotha in the Marriott just outside the entrance to Yosemite). That said, however, it is beyond me why anyone would be doing anything in their room (save for enjoying the hot tub, the view from the deck, or the aforementioned “coupling”) with all of the amenities of this full service resort at their disposal, not to mention this awe-inspiring scenery. If I weren’t going to be locked in a room with my laptop, several servers and a mess of cables, I’d surely go for a hike, boat out on this lake, and set up a massage appointment at the spa. They even have an art gallery here and ATV’s for the more adventurous.

Thursday June 19, 2008

Yesterday proved to be another particularly frustrating day in the server room as we couldn’t get things working quite right and much of today was no different. However, as my career as an engineer has afforded me to experience exotic locales and exquisite cuisines, I’m forever looking on the bright side, even amidst the technical difficulties. The highlight of each of my three days here has been (you guessed it) the food. But these weren’t just meals.

“You can’t drink cristal to this one, you gotta drink crist-All…” Jay-Z from “Excuse Me Miss”

These were gastro experiences. Calling them meals would not be nearly putting enough on them, and dining in the private chambers of the resort owner, just off the kitchen and being waited on hand and foot by the gracious staff was an added bonus. Executive Chef Ronnie Copens really put his foot into every one of the meals he prepared for me. Having a plethora of options from which to choose on the first 2 pages of the menu and a page full of Chef’s special selections on page 3, I decided to mix and match on Tuesday, choosing the quail on a bed of mushroom risotto for my entrée from the chef’s specials and the baked brie in a phyllo pastry as one of my appetizers. This may arguably be one of the best appetizers I have ever had the pleasure to devour.

The chicken Caesar salad wrap that I had for lunch on Wednesday was so good that I decided to break one of my cardinal rules, allowing Chef Ronnie’s expert selections completely guide me for the remainder of my dinners, Wednesday’s being an absolutely divine pistachio encrusted pork tenderloin with almond mashed potatoes. (Big shots out to Tanya the dessert chef who restored my faith in tiramisu and made a latte cheesecake with mascarpone that Eli’s ought to think about mass producing.

Said my co-worker as we walked out of this proverbial last supper with heavy hearts, realizing that we’d both be sitting in coach tomorrow morning paying $8 to eat a grammar-school-cafeteria-quality sandwich and sipping apple juice from a plastic cup with ice cubes the size of Gibraltar, “This is actually that rare business trip that I don’t wanna leave.” Ronnie sent us off right with a cut of veal so big as to make an Argentinian do a double take and and so tender that the knife cut through it like butter.

Somehow I don’t think the Sheraton in Philadelphia is quite going to measure up next week.

Destah Owens is a single father of two from Northern California and proud UCLA Bruin who travels the world for his job as a computer engineer. His blog, “Souffles in Saigon,” is exclusive to Urban Thought Collective.