LIFESTYLE/SELF-HELP

Talking To Yourself

“To achieve all that’s possible, we must attempt the impossible. To be as much as we can be, we must dream of being more” – Author Unknown

We’ll stand up for ourselves when we feel someone is disrespecting us or talking to us in an inappropriate manner. But what happens when we turn out to be the perpetrators? That’s right - sometimes we are our own worst enemy…

We do this with our internal dialogue, also known as self talk. These are thoughts and beliefs that you repeat to yourself while experiencing a situation, reviewing past events or planning for the future. Our internal dialogue is created from beliefs passed down to us by family, friends, and society. Like being a kid and being told you are stupid or dumb. Maybe you were told you can’t do something, or you’ll never amount to anything.

Difficulties arise when our self talk becomes so negative that it causes us to spiral into a state of depression or anxiety. We are human, so experiencing some level of depression or anxiety can be normal. The problem occurs when these states of being become debilitating, preventing the individual from moving beyond his or her present circumstance or even causing one to lose ground.

The good news is that our self talk can be positive too! Thus, we can motivate ourselves in an affirming manner. It’s like having our own backs so to speak.

To escape this pessimistic perspective, you must first become aware of your internal dialogue. Thoughts move very fast, so be patient with yourself during this process. Once you’re aware of the limiting thoughts or beliefs that you tell yourself, restate the thought with a positive outcome. Continue to practice this until the new positive thought becomes the norm.

You can also use daily affirmations such as, “I’m worthy,” or “My life is beautiful,” to successfully overcome these self-defeating thoughts.

Remember, if you tell yourself you can’t or you can, either way you are right. So focus on what you can do and experience a positive outcome.

Roderick Watkins is a Certified Hypnotherapist and doctoral student in Metaphysics. His mission is to aid you in finding resolutions for conflicted parts of your being using spiritual resources to guide you on the path towards a unified self.


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Comments

April 24th, 2008 at 4:22 am Regina Holloway says:

I talk to myself all the time. I always believed it was healthy, but its nice to receive “degreed” confirmation.

April 24th, 2008 at 4:50 am kamalp says:

I DONT KNOW ABOUT THIS.

April 24th, 2008 at 4:56 am Regina Holloway says:

What don’t you know, Kamal? Are you trying to say that you don’t have an inner dialogue? That you don’t weigh your options in your head? That you don’t calm yourself down when you’re upset? That is what we are discussing here.

April 24th, 2008 at 4:57 am kamalp says:

NO DISRESPECT; BUT THATS CALLED *THINKING*

April 24th, 2008 at 6:13 am chica22 says:

I used to do daily affirmations when I was in college. A professor got me on it. I had a book and I’d read one every morning with a bible passage then write the little affirmation down and put the slip of paper in my pocket and just look at it a couple of times a day. I need to start that again.

April 24th, 2008 at 6:41 am UncleD says:

Ok Regina and Kamal, let UncleD referee up in here. Both sides are meaningful. I think Kamal is saying do we need to overanalyze our simple thoughts. I think Regina is saying their is value to defining things. I think Roderick Watkins is talking to folks who are on that level of wanting to explore all parts of their mind. That might not be you, my man. Its all good.

April 24th, 2008 at 10:05 am teradise says:

I am constantly talking to myself. Okay, not driving in the car arguing with myself in a way that would lead people to believe I’m clinically insane, but I motivate myself, convience myself, etc. It’s health and it actually keeps my sanity!

April 24th, 2008 at 11:31 am thelma says:

i know i have to say my affirmations on a daily! words are so powerful, and it really helps

April 24th, 2008 at 11:57 am Tina says:

A positive life is the way to go. A positive vision, positive words, positive thought..it all comes back to you. When someone does you wrong don’t focus on what they did, focus on the good that you received from it. Like getting them out of your life! If we all live for Heaven on Earth this life would be so much richer.

April 24th, 2008 at 12:57 pm Ginger says:

I AM worthy! Thanks this was an inspiring blog.

April 24th, 2008 at 3:31 pm hisherness says:

“Thoughts move very fast, so be patient with yourself during this process.”

Good point, that. I look forward to your column (is that the right term?).

April 24th, 2008 at 5:00 pm Kenneth Boston says:

I’m into this kind of things. Words are powerful. Thoughts are even more powerful than words. If we all truly believed this, then we would say less and mean more.

April 24th, 2008 at 6:21 pm superj says:

Pretty deep. How does the hypnosis thing work?

April 27th, 2008 at 7:29 am N8 says:

Rod is an amazing therapist. For years I struggled with insecurity, self doubt and low self esteem. I was aware of it but it was a secret for most people around me who measured me by my success. What was I was not aware of was the inner voice and thoughts I had which constantly told I was a failure. Amazingly in a short period of time of working with him I was able recognize and hear those recurring thoughts, learn where they came from and immediately dismiss and invalidate them. I love this new so much its incredible.

April 30th, 2008 at 3:14 am Kacy Wilson says:

I love that last part about being right about ourselves no matter what we choose to believe. Perception truly does determine reality when deciding our own limitations. So the question I have Mr. Watkins, is how do move from an affirmation and hoping it has a positive result, to being truly in harmony with those vibrations of those statements? In other words how do we increase the conviction we have in the positive self-talk?

April 30th, 2008 at 9:30 pm Roderick Watkins says:

SuperJ, hypnosis is used to facilitate positive behavorial change. We have many behaviors that appear to be beyond our control because it happens in the unconscious. By inducing a trance state through hypnosis this allows the individual to regain control over these issues.

April 30th, 2008 at 9:42 pm Roderick Watkins says:

Kacy one way of increasing your conviction is by finding things to be grateful for. Appreciating what you have and what it took to get there increases your self value thereby strengthing positive internal dialogue. Another way is to simply be patient with yourself. Be happy if you just notice the negativity and realize you’ll have other oppurtunities to practice positive awareness, thus strengthing your resolve.

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